My professional experience is that average adults often have undeveloped family and relationship vocabularies, and they accept that.
That promotes fuzzy thinking, misunderstandings, arguments, and accumulations of unresolved conflicts.
everyone listens to each others' phone calls, and reads other member's personal mail.
Words and the ideas they symbolize are our basic tools for nurturing healthy inner- family and interpersonal relationships. If a childless stepparent conceives a child with a bioparent partner, that does not make them a blended stepfamily.
Lesson 1 in this site provides an effective way to assess for significant wounds, reduce them over time, and break the ancestral cycle of family dysfunction. all members understand how a change in one part of the system (like a birth, divorce, graduation, geographic move, death, injury, and financial change) affects all family members, roles, rules, and sometimes the boundaries of the system.
Understanding systemic changes and their impacts on family members can help adults adapt and grieve well, and guide kids to do the same..
Kids in intact biofamilies also have developmental needs which require adult help to fill.
Children of divorce and abandonment and typical stepkids have additional sets of family-adjustment needs.